Congress Passes Bill That Sets Up Direct Deposit For Lobbyist Donations

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Frustrated with the often difficult and painful processes to get money from lobbyists and special interest groups into their own grubby hands, Congress today unanimously passed a bill that sets up direct deposits into their checking accounts, according to staff reporters.  “It was getting ridiculous”, said one Congressmen who requested anonymity, “It took like almost 4 months to see the money that trail lawyer lobbyist promised me in exchange for a vote.  Four months!  It seems everything moves fast in 2021 except payoffs from lobbyists.  Today’s bill fixes that.” 

As of press time a growing minority in Congress were exploring the acceptance of Bitcoin from lobbyists on an experimental basis.